1. Scrunch – don’t fold.
2. Don’t buy home brands.
3. Use the packing it comes in. In this case, it would be preferable to buy the brown paper packaged variety – the plastic casings tend to slip a bit.
4. Install a bidet.
5. Ban visitors from using the toilet. Offer them the backyard. Or let them use the toilet, but offer them a handful of tissues.
6. Wet it. It will expand.
7. Roll it in dirt. You will spend so much time searching for a clean square your business will set in its place – all the easier to go on your way sans a wipe down. Note to self: This method may require more frequent washing machine cycles.
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